in the middle of a project

[Jules M.]

few days ago some body came to visit, my quilt corner is in my living room, above that i was in the middle of a project....
she wasnt impressed :shock: at all....from the mess and dust. i tried to convince her that when i am not quilting my living room is different all together, but i saw her glass look. ....well, i decided to adopt ;if you quilt it is ok to have a mess' .
you win some, you loose some

[Jules M.]

I visit people b/c of their wonderful personality not because they are fantastic housekeepers. Sorry she gave you the glazed over look. Keep quilting!!

[Lotti D.]

if you saw the state of my living room at the moment - you'd feel oh so much better. my friends still drop in - enjoy something to drink, a chat, a movie, sometimes even dinner with laptrays as the dining (living) room table is used for the sewing machine...
they come because we like each other and enjoy each others' company - not to look at the dust and judge
it can be like this for months when i'm in a certain project or 5 (as right now)... once they're completed (or at least in a manageable condition) i clear everything up (i DO clean regularly - there's just a lot of sewing clutter hanging about) for a few months - invite guests for real proper multi-course sit at a table and relax meals - and the same people come and enjoy (at the moment my plan is to be in a madhouse until end of this month - then put everyting away nice and tidy and by the 5th of august have an uncluttered comfortable home until christmas (doing mainly - handquilting various items - assembling the SOTT quilt) - and during the christmas holidays i get to start my next big project and start spreading again...)

don't worry about short-term visitors who can't understand and work their mind around a life beyond "presentation"
our true friends are here for us - whenever - under any circumstances - life is too short to waste on those that judge us for appearance only
keep quilting and enjoy life :wink:

[Lotti D.]

We would all like to have spotless homes, but we live in them. Yesterday, my husband was spilling water across my kitchen floor while I was still mopping it--that's life! Beds can't be made up while we sleep in them. Anyway, my goal is not to have a spotless home, but a clean (not necessarily always neat) and comfortable home. If you maintain a clean, comfortable home, make your guests feel welcomed and feed them, then they won't care if your home is always tidy. Guests won't be comfortable nor feel welcomed if there's no clean place to sit or eat.

My friends and family are always welcome to drop by, but if they don't call ahead, they get what they get.

I noticed that you said somebody rather than a friend. A friend wouldn't judge!

[Lotti D.]

My criteria is that the house has to be clean enough so that the health inspector would not condemn it. It is MY house and I feel comfortable enough with myself that if it works for me then the most important person has been pleased. I do make concessions for my husband but not for the occasional drop in visitor. We all know someone that would find fault even if our home was a shrine. As far as DH, I am far neater and more organized than he will ever hope to be, so it's a breeze. Slowly my adult sons see merit in putting things away so that it is easier to find when they need it again. Their standards are definitely are lower than mine. I can now find a corner to sit and visit and so the important part is accomplished.

[Lotti D.]

If it bothered them that much, suggest they return when the project is done with the understanding it will probably take a while. Also like mentioned earlier, if they don't call ahead, they get what they get.

[Barbara C.]

Oh my gosh, Becky. Don't let it bother you. My husband say's our dachshunds live in a five star hotel with room service and we live in a dog kennel. Our den caters to the dogs and our laid back lifestyle. I sort of pick up when people come. ;-) I keep my sewing room organized out of necessity. Things in containers or out of reach to keep puppy mouths off them!

[Barbara C.]

Friends who judge.... are not friends and I cut the visit short..... so I can get back to my quilting.
Do not need or want them in my life.

[Barbara C.]

Well, the table and chairs are not sticky. You can see the hair on the floors from the dogs. My drafting stuff is on the loveseat in the living room so I can work on it while watching television. Right now, I have a quilt laid out on my bed. No dishes in the sink but the dish washer needs to be run. But, I have finished four quilts this summer and I am working on several others. My sewing studio? Don't ask about the mess in there. You know--my house was cleaner when my kids were at home--after all I was setting an example. Now--I'm happy.

[Barbara C.]

Well, the table and chairs are not sticky. You can see the hair on the floors from the dogs. My drafting stuff is on the loveseat in the living room so I can work on it while watching television. Right now, I have a quilt laid out on my bed. No dishes in the sink but the dish washer needs to be run. But, I have finished four quilts this summer and I am working on several others. My sewing studio? Don't ask about the mess in there. You know--my house was cleaner when my kids were at home--after all I was setting an example. Now--I'm happy.

Not only to set an example, but they were in the space you so desperately needed to expand into. :wink:

[Cath P.]

I've been sick for over a week. As a single mum of teenage boys, that means very little gets done. Tonight is craft night, and my friends are coming over. I should cancel as I'm still sick, but I need the company! Sooo.. dishes are now done, washing is happening, and I might sweep the floors.. but my friends love me, the chatter and tea we will enjoy. They know the house can be clean, but today, it will be what it is. I will clean it properly when I am well, and until then, it is clean enough!

Enjoy your true friends, who comment that you must be having a great time because the housework can wait!

[Cath P.]

Here is an example of a true friend: My parents adopted 3 babies after I got married. Their friends came to visit them one evening and the babies had been sick for a couple of days. The four adults were talking. The next thing my parents knew they woke up the next morning covered up with blankets in their chairs. The babies were sleeping, laundry was washed, dried, folded and put away. The kitchen was cleaned and the whole house picked up. The friends were no where to be found. They slipped out in the middle of the night after they made sure everyone was okay and they did all the work they could. When mom called to apologize for falling asleep and thanking them, she was told it was not necessary. Her friend said that they were very happy to have the opportunity to do something for them.

I know this story might be a bit different because of sick babies, but as the others have said, friends don't judge. IMHO friends come to visit you, not your house, and if they know you have been under stress or having an extra busy time, they would find a way to help and not condemn.

Judy

[Lotti D.]

oh judy, what a great story/memory
yes - those are true friends - and i'm very happy to say that i have friends like these as well - i'll forever be greatful!

[Lotti D.]

Judy--definitely true friends.

[Lotti D.]

Judy - Great to hear your parent's story!

Thanks for posting.

BarbCA