Quilting takes action

[Betty J.]

The other day I was talking with some women I met at a symphony concert and they asked me what I do for a living. I told them I had just retired to become a full time fabric artist, which mostly involves making art quilts at the moment. I got "that look" (down the nose) and "that [dismissive] comment"..."I don't have the patience for that. My [great grandmother, some old old old old woman-always a woman] makes quilts all by hand." :roll: :? Fortunately, the intermission got over just at that time and we went back in to hear the concert so I didn't have the chance to tell her what I thought. :twisted: :lol:

Why does it always sound like an insult?! Maybe because it's meant as one, even if they don't realize it. They probably wouldn't be caught dead doing anything resembling handwork, don't understand where quilting has gone these days, and consider such activities they regard as simply women's work of yore as degrading. They probably also buy their Chinese made quilts from the box store and think it's overpriced at $100. :wink:

I was talking to my youngest son about this and I said "quilting doesn't take patience. I'm not a particularly patient person." His answer was wonderful. He said "Quilting takes action." I loved that response so much I thought I'd share it with you. (He's seen my struggles with quilting and knows for a fact that I'm not particularly patient.) Next time someone says "that comment" with "that look" to you, tell them "You know, quilting really takes action, and a bit of passion. And you might be amazed if you looked at what's been happening to quilting lately?" It won't change their opinion but you might feel a bit better.

[Nancy R.]

I found this post interesting because I've never felt like anyone I've encountered has minimized the quilting effort. In fact, I've always felt the opposite. The people I've talked to seem to respond with amazement or excitement and tend to ask questions about it. It seems like there are several possible reasons for this:
- I may not notice any dismissive or negative reactions since I'm so excited about it and I'm not good at picking up on social cues (I'm a software engineer and am most comfortable with the reactions of computers)
- my community (meaning the people I tend to encounter) may be more sensitive to the art and craft of endeavors like quilting
- I may talk with so much excitement that the other person is overwhelmed by this before any other feelings can surface
- I still have my full-time job so quilting is still a "hobby" so the time that I put into it may be seen in a different light than it would be if it was my career
I don't know, those are just guesses. But I'm always excited to talk about quilting and always feel like others appreciate what we do.

Nancy

[Janet K.]

I have gotten that response from a friend of mine. We went to nursing school together and are now both retired. I was a little hurt and did not respond but just thought she has no idea what quilting is about these days.

It was nice to read your words which were so clear as to my feelings, and love your sons response!

I love the challenge of quilting!! Janet

[Pamela O.]

Good thinking. You might want to add that quilting is over a billion dollar industry. That should garner some looks!

[Pamela O.]

I recently met an old girlfriend from highschool, who I keep in touich with once or twice a year. I told her I went to a quilting retreat, and she said `Boy, you really need to get a life; I should take you out clubbing (drinking`and dancing). I think quilting is like a call, like the call to the sea, like sailors, or a call to montian climbing, or being a musician. Some people just don`t understand the passion and the art of quilting.

BTW - I`m going to the dentist in an hour, and I`ve just never understood how or why anyone in their right mind would want to spend their life time career looking into peoples`mouths. But obviously many people do it! To me, I ask 'is that a life?" However, they get paid more than we generally do for their craft.

[Pamela O.]

I recently met an old girlfriend from highschool, who I keep in touich with once or twice a year. I told her I went to a quilting retreat, and she said `Boy, you really need to get a life; I should take you out clubbing (drinking`and dancing). I think quilting is like a call, like the call to the sea, like sailors, or a call to montian climbing, or being a musician. Some people just don`t understand the passion and the art of quilting.

BTW - I`m going to the dentist in an hour, and I`ve just never understood how or why anyone in their right mind would want to spend their life time career looking into peoples`mouths. But obviously many people do it! To me, I ask 'is that a life?" However, they get paid more than we generally do for their craft.

I bet a bunch of quilters on a retreat could probably last longer into the night having a whoopie time, a little drink or 2, some wonderful cakes, and be able to hear the conversation going on around them, rather than a bunch of clubbers. And you have something to show for your time (unless you were too busy nattering to stitch, that is :wink: )

Good job I double checked this entry before I posted it, I had originally written 'conservation', rather than 'conversation' ops: - a slight difference in meaning there, anyone want to get pickled :wink: :lol:

[Marion D.]

when the subject is introduced, mostly people are impressed because they think of quilts as having lots and lots of little pieces. (My lastest took less than an hour to piece because I only sewed together 18 pieces, including the borders.) I overheard at our quilt show several years ago: "$500! I could buy one from Penney's from less than $50!" It is probably a good thing I walked right on by!

[Marion D.]

Hmm, I don't get much of a response about my quilting until someone actually sees one of my quilts and then I get a response that is usually positive--I also get "I could never do that" or "I don't have the patience for that". But my daughter told me that one of the grands had a friend over and they saw their quilt. The grand said "that's my grand champion quilt that my grandma made". She thinks all of my quilts are grand champions.

[Marion D.]

Hmm, I don't get much of a response about my quilting until someone actually sees one of my quilts and then I get a response that is usually positive--I also get "I could never do that" or "I don't have the patience for that". But my daughter told me that one of the grands had a friend over and they saw their quilt. The grand said "that's my grand champion quilt that my grandma made". She thinks all of my quilts are grand champions.

Which of course they are!

I have found that unless you are actually showing off a piece of handmade needlework - whatever technique it is - most people are completely clueless, and think that it is something that was only done in the 'olden times' :roll: Which is why it is useful to have made vest or handbag that you use for everyday, then you automatically have an item to show some of your skills.

[Betty J.]

Please don't misunderstand--I wasn't upset, just wished I could think of an appropriate non-confrontational response. Since I have encountered that "I don't have the patience" with a dismissive and condescending look several times, and I'm sure that many of you have, I just wanted to share the wonderful simple response for use when people ARE a bit condescending in that way...quilting takes action and passion just like any art. And yes, pointing to the fact that it is a multi-billion dollar business these days usually makes an impression. I'm happy for those of you who have never encountered this, but it does happen sometimes. These same people probably would never be as condescending to an artist who uses paints, or a musician, or a sailor, or a dentist. I never have encountered anything but the nicest comments when people actually see my quilts or jackets or bags.

[Hannelore N.]

If I detect any 'snootyness' when I'm asked about what I do, I sometimes say: "My fulltime job is working with special needs teenagers, and in my spare time I'm a textile artist that exhibits internationally. I organize and run Warhammer tournaments, and I'm occasionally used as an interpreter by the Home Office for medical hearings at Rampton High Security Prison, and by the Police when interviewing people suspected of criminal activities. If there is any time left I read poetry........ And what do YOU do?" I usually shuts them up.

Seriously: It's so very important that we all feel comfortable in our own skin, because then it doesn't upset us what others say or think. My main ambition in life is that my children and my granddaughter will always smile when they talk about me, or when (in 50 years or so) they remember me. If at the same time they wrap themselves into a quilt I made, and have a piece of my textile art (aka little wallhanging) on the wall in their home, then that's a bonus - but not compulsory.

[Hannelore N.]

Lorchen, Well said: You are a busy and talented lady with a great attitude.

I'd Just like to ask what's a warhammer? Well, I guess forget that because I just remembered I can google it!
But you've pricked my interest.

[Hannelore N.]

wow, first you are lucky to have such an insightful son, and what a great perspective. I do think that "quilting" does get relegated to "women's work" and therefore somehow "bad" or "archaic". It's up to us to remind people that ALL WORK, all ACTION and ART is beautiful and deserving of respect!

[Hannelore N.]

Lorchen - do you speak Elvish?

[Kathryn S.]

Betty Jo, Thanks for bringing up the subject! I have come to see myself as a minor ambassador for quilting and for "women's work" in general. Many of the people that I know who aren't quilters give me the same response of "I'm not that patient" also. I also try to respond with love and enthusiasm about how wonderful it is to have a passion, the joy of creating art, the dignity of making things by hand- I'm including sewing machines here. Probably I haven't convinced any of them but they might realize that people do quilt in modern times, it's not something that's from the past.

I can remember as a child of the 60's that we repudiated womens' work, and it took me a few years to realize that there's nothing wrong with calling something that. It's part of me and I embrace it. I'm not very domestic but I love textiles and color!

The episode of Why Quilts Matter about the Gee's Bend quilters perfectly expresses this for me. I was awed by these women and their work.



kathy